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Pages: sometimes you have to experiment [1]
Author Topic: Sometimes you have to experiment
calhoon

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Posts: 3

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2011-02-08 16-57-11

sometimes you have to experiment to find out what works for you... I had been sexually active for 15 years and couldn't figure out why my fantasies made me wet but I was dry as the Sahara when there was a flesh and blood man in my bed... Last year I discovered that even the thought of bdsm gets me ready - actual pain makes me drip in anticipation of sex. The lesson is NOT that bdsm will help you (although maybe it will), it's that you have to discover what gets you off. Good luck - sounds like a fun goal to have!!
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tonn

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Posts: 14

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2011-02-09 9-46-55-

sounds to me your not comforable with your self
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  • wilbert

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    Posts: 18

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    2011-02-09 21-53-50

    you know... this is a pretty legit and insightful comment. I'm trying to reconcile this with the stuff in the thread above. Are you teasing everyone with the hook-up post?
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    sweetman

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    Posts: 30

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    2011-02-10 6-01-57-

    hey never hurts to ask you just don't know
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    ascencio

    Sexy
    Posts: 5

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    2011-02-10 19-59-24

    yeah, but then you kicked everyone around. pretty much assuring that no would be dropping their pants for you. Why don't you relax and hang out with us in a more friendly way? I'll be your online wing man and give you tips.
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  • mesner

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    2011-02-11 11-38-03

    hey they started kicking i just din't back down
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    erland

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    Posts: 6

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    2011-02-11 12-13-59

    oh no...i didn't kick you. and you started it you kicking cblguy was the part that made me sure that your dick would stay holstered for all eternity. you feel free to write your own revisionist history, of course.
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  • Corly

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    Posts: 9

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    2011-02-11 23-39-53

    That almost happened to me for a while... Here is what I learned about myself: 1. I jerked off too much. 2. I was to uptight during sex and felt that either the woman didn't really like me or I didn't really like her, and so I felt bad. Combine those issues, and there were times were I almost couldn't cum, but I pretty much powered through it, but it wasn't a very nice time (in my head). My solution: 1. Stop jerking off as much. If you are really motivated, go a week without, and a guarantee that you'll cum from sex. 2. Find something really sexy about the woman, and let yourself go; stop thinking and just go with it. That has worked. I had issues, and still might, but I am able to enjoy sex much more these days. Good luck bro!
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    lorraine

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    2011-02-12 18-16-39

    yes, you can see a doctor... It has nothing to do with being gay or not. Go to your general practitioner and explain the problem and he will likely refer you to a urologist. (Actually, I think the McKinsey group did studies showing that even straight males get aroused at the sight of erect penises in porn. It had nothing to do with being gay, but just the suggestive imagery correlating to the body...)
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    hagedorn

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    2011-02-24 6-03-32-

    Hmm.... Okay, let me ask you some questions: 1) Are you able to maintain your erection the whole time? 2) If so, are you in shape and have you tried different positions? I've found that I can fuck for an hour, and still not come (my girlfriend was pissed/happy; pissed because she was very very sore the next day, but she did enjoy herself quite a bit.... times in fact). Anyways, back on topic, that was basiy with her on her back, me on top, and a variety of different leg positions. I found that when I rolled her over, and we did it doggy style, I was able to force her to move to thrust me into her at my own rhythm*; I came in no time flat! And it was awesome!! * PS: Is that the correct way to spell rhythm? Wow, no traditional vowels. What a great scrabble word!!
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  • howey

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    Posts: 17

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    2011-03-02 15-57-38

    Yes and yes. Maintaining has never been an issue for me. Going long past what's decent has. I've had relationships sour because my girlfriend was done but I wasn't. (And like I mentioned in the previous post, I used to think it was their fault cause they were just bad at it, they were getting off, but I wasn't) I work out three times a week and eat healthy, plus I have asian genes that make me look like I'm still 18(I'm mid 20s now) and don't let me gain weight no matter what I do. I tend to be a little demanding in bed so I tend to control the pace and the activities involved, I've tried almost everything I can think of, and with the escorts I went past how far I usually would go and managed to try a *lot* of really kinky stuff I wouldn't have dared bust out on a girlfriend, but it still didn't do it for me.
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    schiffman

    Newbie
    Posts: 12

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    2011-03-24 12-06-14

    Hmm.... well for lack of any other advice Perhaps you're just too used to your hand, the way you like to do it? I know that I was for a while... I'm not really sure what else to suggest... I mean, "just let go" and "relax" is all good advice... Personally for me, doing her while she's on all fours lets me mimic the slow down / speed up that I do when I masturbate, if I'm having trouble, I'll also just start imagining all the things I would were I masturbating. I think the suggestions to lay off masturbation are good, try multiple positions, and just have fun. Have you ever been able to cum from a blow job? Wow... I think I've shared way too much...
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    zaske

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    Posts: 20

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    2011-08-05 19-50-48

    heh
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    mandigo

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    Posts: 27

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    2011-12-02 15-56-59

    Don't laugh at me lingua :-( You make me a sad panda
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  • knapik

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    Posts: 16

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    2012-08-08 2-44-04-

    I'm not laughing at you. I thought that it was cute/and sympathetic that you had that overshare moment.
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    Nichole

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    Posts: 53

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    2013-03-07 10-56-35

    Did you try a prostate massage?
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  • macalpine

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    Posts: 52

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    2013-08-18 9-35-11-

    Nope... And nothing is going up that-a-way. And even if that works, I'm pretty sure the type of girls I date would never be up for 'that'.
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    orum

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    2014-01-06 22-44-48

    Hey, honestly answer this... what do YOU think your problem is? Think about it long and hard, and analyze yourself. I think it's mental with you. Are you a smarter than average guy, or a caveman? Your mind may be fucking with you. Perhaps you are looking for theand only, true love and your body won't let you give the best of yourself to some skank??
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    fenner

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    Posts: 57

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    2014-12-31 12-57-51

    Can you get off from a hand job? Maybe you're just used to a certain kind of stimulation. I would try a hand job and see if that works for you. If it does, maybe you can work on progressing from that. Or maybe you'll just always need a hand job to get off-- no big deal, really. (Of course, I love giving hand jobs, so maybe I'm biased.) Another question- have you ever masturbated in front of a partner, and if so, could you orgasm that way?
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  • cabot

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    Posts: 51

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    2015-09-23 10-45-51

    In the same boat. Went for a week long sex filled trip a few weeks back. Fucked and sucked atleast twice a day. Came twice the entire time. By my own hands. I can masturbate to orgasm easily. No problems there. Its not the sex or the other partner. I took command with the intent on getting off. No luck. My theory is that you need to keep the hands off for a while. When I get back into a committed relationship, I'm going to make a rule not to masturbate. Dan Savage had an article about this, but basiy he said you have to completely change how you masturbate. Going to an extremely light touch. Tried that, and it did help a little. Good luck.
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