Adult finder dating

Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
News: Adult free online dating - Today hot theme: sexy slim enjoying m seeks older horny woman who needs many als, cute girl trying to find sexy situation, married woman horny Falls Church VA, Beechworth
 
   Adult free online dating   Help Login Register  
Pages: I have come out late in life. Have questions... [1]
Author Topic: I have come out late in life. Have questions...
grindrod

Full Member
Posts: 2

View Profile 
2011-02-08 14-17-21

I have come out late in life. Have questions... FYI, I am happily and comfortably a lesbian and I am over 40. I would simply appreciate your thoughts. I have noticed that there seems to be a lot of separation in the lesbian community as to "type." For example, butch, femme, lesbian, stone, etc. I am curious about this because it this seems to be a very "tunnel vision" approach to identity and to love. Also, the lesbian (I'm referring to all gay women as lesbians just for now) community seems to be very separated--as in not unified-- over these and other issues. I'm disappointed. What are your thoughts on this? Is there something that I am not perceiving correctly? I want to feel more united with gay women.
Any nice gentlemen with style?, relationship advice for women Arcola, Valley East Ontario

Find Hot Sexy Girls in

sweetman

Sr. Member
Posts: 6

View Profile 
2011-02-09 2-56-34-

Wimmin come in many beautiful shapes and sizes with many personality types. The Mother Goddess in her eternal wisdom created us to be passionate free-thinkers. We do not conform. We resist the ways of the manfolk and enjoy our wimminly nature. Learn to love our differences and embrace us all!
Young in shape guy needs head, horny female Sisseton SD, Marysvale UT, Gordon PA, Willow Lake SD - Brookport IL, Meridian Station
alms

Newbie
Posts: 14

View Profile 
2011-02-09 10-37-25

Yes, that is how I feel, but have you noticed the strong separation in the community? Look at the postings in the personals (where I also just posted this same dconcern), so many individuals refer to themselves as a "type" looking for a "type." what do you make of this? Please note everyone, I am just trying to understand this behavior because the "community" seems to be very segregated among "types."
Passionate Top 4 bottom, married woman flings Wilcox Saskatchewan, Lutsk - Paradise Valley Alberta
chatmon

Newbie
Posts: 2

View Profile 
2011-02-10 5-24-36-

while i get what you are saying do you feel that the lesbian community is much different than the straight community as far as self segregation and labels and stuff? as many ads as there are looking for a type (or more often in my experience *excluding* a type -as in NO butches or whatever) there seem to be just as many touting their own lack of a label. shrugs. i see it as people wanting to be with people that are like them. as in, yuppies with yuppies, or punks with punks or whatever. i think the community is vast, and can depend on geography a bit as well. i am in the sacramento area, and there is some serious hatred towards butches and butch/femme flying about on the personal ads here. which sucks for me since i am a femme interested in butches. i wonder if it has more to do with the butch/femme and andro scene being so popular and or common in sfo? either way, dont feel like you have to put a label on yourself right away or ever. i find labeling myself a femme useful since its sort of descriptive but no should feel that lableing oneself necessary.
looking for a beautiful women to coach me in dating, women looking for couples Twentynine Palms CA -
ing sigle woman ers, big huge girls that love to fuck.
scrivner

Member
Posts: 16

View Profile 
2011-02-10 14-22-43

This is very helpful and I feel like I'm getting the picture. Since my relationship recently ended and I am feeling a great loss, I have been going to the personals postings looking for "community." "Community" as in being like me! :) I realize now, after reading many kind responses (I posted this observation on the personals board as well) that I am trying to make a board of a vast number of indiviudals my own personal 'community." I am taking out my sadness on others who are expressing themselves in their own way. Thank you for the response. I wrote a posting for my friend last night and put it on 4w4 personals: "Easy to Love...", my friend is a butch looking for a femme. Just mentioning it.....:)
BBW For Drinks, Fun, and More!, adult alternative dating - Rainsville AL, Satsop WA, San Miguel CA, Hindsville

Members in looking for a horny date

shrout

Member
Posts: 7

View Profile 
2011-02-11 7-11-22-

keep coming here. This is a great community. the folks here rock. I've gotten lots of great advice and support here. And they've gotten me through many - a - lonely workday.
Morning J/O Buddy, matchmaker dating Elverson PA - Pisek, Henderson NC
  • Dating married men Harare
  • ashlock

    Newbie
    Posts: 19

    View Profile 
    2011-02-11 19-33-00

    Thank you flyingdogs and everyone else too for making me feel so welcome. I really appreciate the "education" - it is all a learning experience for me. Everyone here has been so gentle - even when disagreeing. I have also learned a better way to respond to others. When the message is given in kindness, I actually "hear" what is being said and learn from it, rather than reacting to it. I LOVE YOU GUYS! ("Guys" as in every ) :)
    24 horny, love dating site Tutwiler, Dutchtown MO - Lichfield, Lind WA, Lumberton NC, Centerton AR
    lundmark

    Member
    Posts: 2

    View Profile 
    2011-02-11 20-57-31

    Don't judge all Lesbians by 's List ads ... as Feisty wisely posted, everyone has preferences, but I don't find my communities divided as a result. My circle has all "types," but I just think of them as people. And so much butch/femme & top/bottom stuff is not as it seems on the surface, and much is negotiated on within a relationship. Don't get hung up on roles and labels. They do exist, and they can be fun, but just be yourself. Everything tends to fall intpo place after that. Welcome "out"!
    Single father seeks the open minded, swingers around Larimore ND - Heritage Village, Fortuna Foothills AZ
    shadrick

    Sexy
    Posts: 14

    View Profile 
    2011-02-11 23-10-09

    I love you woombmoon! I never miss a post.
    Looking for hot fun this morning, seeking older ladies -
  • Singles ads Carson CA
  • pickle

    Hero Member
    Posts: 4

    View Profile 
    2011-02-11 23-41-36

    just be yourself So long as you feel comfortable in yourself and happy, you don't need to worry about how others identify.
    Moving from Seattle, get pussy Iredell, Hilltop MN, Creve Coeur MO, Rehobeth AL - Logan UT, Towanda IL, Hinsdale NH, Big Stone City
  • Good morning freaks and kinksters
  • Naveen

    User
    Posts: 4

    View Profile 
    2011-02-12 1-24-53-

    Yes, you are right. I have read various responses (all gentle) because I posted this in the personals as well and i am feeling differently now. More supportive of everyone and i too, have received only support. Thanks.
    Bodywork for Military and SCAD Students, sex friend Redondo Beach CA, Saranac - Beallsville PA, Moundville MO, Aktobe, Purnia
    ing sigle woman ers, big huge girls that love to fuck.
    brannan

    Member
    Posts: 18

    View Profile 
    2011-02-12 9-24-12-

    I think maybe the youngsters enjoy categorizing themselves. Or maybe it's a regional thing. None of my friends do it beyond a little bit of describing behavior or hairstyles as butch. I was shocked by how many on this board describe themselves as butch or femme. Maybe it's just a handy shortcut.
    Tuesday at Las Vegas Airport, adult friends finder -
    mente

    Full Member
    Posts: 17

    View Profile 
    2011-02-13 21-16-42

    Hmm... Are you an oldster?
    Horny and Staying Downtown, men looking for women Postville Newfoundland, Walcott ND, Coral Hills, Irbid - Clarks Grove MN, Tatum TX
    ing sigle woman ers, big huge girls that love to fuck.
    vicky

    Member
    Posts: 30

    View Profile 
    2011-03-16 6-31-58-

    I think so. Not x yet, but getting there.
    Need A Gym Buddy, local swinger Lapwai ID, Cherokee AL -
  • Black dating online Woodsboro TX
  • graciano

    Member
    Posts: 53

    View Profile 
    2011-07-10 4-20-55-

    I Agree. I am x and find myself running.. From communities with people my age. Everything is always in an uproar. Drama here, drama there. No can have civilized conversations... especially when you throw the teenagers into the mix. It's trite.
    Any ladies needing a case of permagrin and quivering ?, sci fi dating Lueders TX - Red Wing Colorado
    shewmaker

    Sexy
    Posts: 31

    View Profile 
    2011-12-13 23-15-09

    well.......*sigh* i'm x,and i'm just starting to begin to want to date.... i consider myself femme,but i think i'm just queer,and whatever,i wear dresses,i have short hair,i just am myself. As far as being attracted to a type,i usually look for girls like me.....but i'm not opposed to any certain type. dating scares the hell out of me...am i the only like this????
    bottom on friday, sex an fucking Saint Anthony Idaho, Energy IL, Temagami Ontario, Edwards Missouri - Corry PA, Blanchardville WI, Hackensack NJ, Russel Springs Kentucky
  • Personals ads Towaoc CO
  • hutchcraft

    Member
    Posts: 37

    View Profile 
    2012-08-27 7-42-01-

    Definitely not. I've pretty much put off dating. Mainly because I either like people or I don't. And if don't like someone I'm not going to spend my time forcing it. It'll happen when it happens.
    Yum cardiovascular garage parking gal., anormal sex Foster Virginia - Walnut Grove, Bernville Pennsylvania, East Dorset Vermont, Hyannis Port
  • married swinger want women for fun
  • Jolene

    Member
    Posts: 41

    View Profile 
    2013-04-14 17-43-31

    I haven't found age to be a factor at all. I have a few friends my age (x+) who do categorize themselves. Also, if you read the personals, you will find that all ages categorize themselves at butch, femme, etc. Go there now and you'll see.
    Fondling and Edging, horny forest Leavenworth KS, Riverhead NY - Collyer Kansas, Newfields New Hampshire, Annandale-on-Hudson, Bryants Store Kentucky
    cuda

    Hero Member
    Posts: 39

    View Profile 
    2014-02-16 18-23-53

    Great idea. :) Thanks!
    Heading to gym interested in play afterwards, married bbw women Toamasina, Wolcott, Kewaunee Wisconsin, Mantua - Gackle North Dakota, Broward Estates FL, Alicante, Parker School MT
  • Hard cock Chardon
  • janson

    Full Member
    Posts: 94

    View Profile 
    2015-06-24 6-00-08-

    In my city, Minneapolis, onlymention of butch or femme in the topposts. We're low volume, so that's all x of today's posts and the first x of yesterday's. I'm not pretending to know anything, just speculating. I thought maybe it was an age or regional thing or a handy shortcut. No hidden agenda on my part, no attempted slam on any
    Kneeling before you decide to, dating sites women - Brossard Quebec, Spencer ID, Rockville Rhode Island, Williamsburg Indiana
    bittman

    Newbie
    Posts: 10

    View Profile 
    2015-12-08 18-30-52

    But you are reading the Personals and the ones at that. Do you really think they represent the entire lesbian community (or lack thereof)? If I place a personal ad in search of butch women (or femme women, or tall women, or sporty women) for dating, it only means that these are the women I'm attracted to. Does your circle of friends consist only of women you find sexually attractive? Thank god mine does not. The personals are really no indication of lesbians as community. I think a lot of women when they first come out have very high expectations of other lesbians. They can feel sort of exposed, like they've sacrificed a certain comfort and security, and they expect this imaginary lesbian community to sort of step in and provide comfort. They feel sort of ripped off when they realize that we are not some giant support group. Nobody arrives on your doorstep with a fresh-baked pie and an invitation to the neighborhood picnic. If you want community, then you will have to do the work. As has been mentioned ad nauseum in this forum, there are plenty of opportunites to volunteer at queer events. By volunteering, you can meet women who have similar interests to yours. You can stop caring whether they themselves butch or femme or whatever and just get on with the business of making friends.
    Bi wm regarding visiting bi wm, big fuck key Shizuishan - Pacolet Mills South Carolina

    Related Posts

     

    Report Abuse

    Valid CSS! Powered by SMF 1.1.11 | SMF © 2006-2009, Simple Machines LLC Valid XHTML 1.0!